Scott’s credit card records made clear he had paid for memberships to quite a few dating websites, particularly sites where men were searching for sugar babies, mistresses and hookups. I didn’t search for his profiles on those websites while we were collecting evidence, however. In part, I assumed they would be too hard to find. Unless he put his picture in his profile, it would be difficult to even identify a profile and username as his. In addition, the banking and phone records already were sufficient evidence to show what he had been doing. The profiles simply weren’t essential for his deposition or trial, if it came to that.

Still, it really was unfortunate when I found his dating profiles about six months after our trial was completed, too late to use them as evidence. What prompted me finding them? On Tuesday, August 18, 2015 the Ashley Madison website was hacked “by a group called the ‘Impact Team,’ who then exposed users of the site by leaking their emails on the Dark Web.” ¹

Thank you, Impact Team!

I already knew Scott had looked for women on Ashley Madison – the purchase was right there in the credit card records. He probably had used one of his many hidden emails to set up the account. Still, I had a good laugh when news of the Ashley Madison hack broke. You had to wonder about these dumb schmucks who set up their Ashley Madison account using their work or legitimate personal emails (ones their spouses knew about)! How clever Scott was to have set up hidden emails for all of this! He must have really been pissed his wife was smart enough to find out anyway!

The news of the hack and searching the database wouldn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know. But it was hard for me to resist the urge to check the emails anyway. By this point, investigating a new thread of information had become a habit for me, even an obsession. He had lied so thoroughly and convincingly I developed a compulsion for pulling every thread I happened to come across.

I tried all of Scott’s emails (hidden and the legitimate personal one) against one of the search websites to see which one he had used. Two of the hidden emails produced hits, meaning there was a good chance both had been used to set up Ashley Madison accounts and profiles. These emails had been uncovered as a part of both the Hotels.com document production and the Virgin Mobile hidden phone he had set up.

I continued to unravel this particular thread. Were those emails still actively being used? Or could he have terminated those accounts when I subpoenaed the hidden email records, just in case? If he did shut them down, were they now email addresses available for me to legitimately request as a new account? And if I resurrected those email addresses such that now they were my email addresses — could I use them to get the Ashley Madison profile?

It turns out the answer to all of these questions was yes. As a result, I gained access to the Ashley Madison profile he established in September, 2008.

 

His profile (user name bestNSAfriend; NSA = No Strings Attached) identified his location as Waltham, MA, some thirty minutes from our home! It was not a surprise sex (and his skill at it) was a major theme of his profile. He particularly emphasized his oral fixation, “I LOVE TO BE ORAL – been told I am very good at it to (his error).” No spell or grammar check for him – there were a number of other errors. Then again, bad grammar probably was not a deal-breaker with the hook-up audience he was after.

I wondered if he had used the same username on any other sites so I did a google search of “bestNSAfriend.” Up popped “bestnsafriend,” a member of SexSearch looking for women in Franklin Lakes, NJ at roughly the same time. Franklin Lakes was one of the places Scott frequented for business with a long term client.

I wasn’t surprised “bestnsafriend’s” physical description matched Scott’s. He even had the same birthday though claiming to be a year younger. I had heard everyone lied on their on-line dating profiles. Scott was no exception.

Bestnsaboyfriend emphasized his intelligence and conversational skills, as if it was going to matter to a woman looking on a site named SEXSEARCH.com. He added he was successful and generous, so money for sex was on the table. He described himself as “Reasonably attractive.” I wonder how women looking on SEXSEARCH.com translate that description?

I also checked the emails against the other dating websites identified as charges to his credit cards. He used the hidden emails to set up quite a few!

wscott9527@yahoo.com had a profile on Match.com established sometime between 2008 and 2009, again looking in Franklin Lakes, NJ. He claimed to be a widower and “a partner in my own consulting firm.” He must have thought a widower would attract more women than a single or divorced man.

wscott9527@yahoo.com also had a profile on Sugardaddie.com. This profile was set up in June 2010, in Bethel, Connecticut. He indicated in the profile he had already engaged in sugar daddy relationships so he knew money was a requirement. He described himself as “smart, reasonably handsome.” Does that translate to dweeb in the sugar daddy world?

Scott apparently set up dating profiles wherever he went. wscott9527@yahoo.com had a profile on Seekingarrangements.com, established in March 2010 in White Plains, NY.

In February 2011, he even identified his location as Westwood, MA, our hometown, in his profile on Sugardaddyforme.com. Ballsy move – right in our neighborhood! At this point he described himself as “Attractive,” – he must have learned “reasonably attractive” wasn’t going to cut it. He embellished his “Smart” descriptor with “good conversation about just about anything……” Only Scott would describe his endless monologue of bullshit as “good conversation!”

The dating profiles I found revealed Scott to be brazen in his search for women, though he never gave his picture. He emphasized his generosity, a must for getting a sugar baby date. He also claimed to be quite the romantic and attentive lover, with an emphasis (perhaps a fixation) on foreplay and oral. Of course he described himself as an excellent, smart, conversationalist, which I know he believed was true. He was amazingly clueless about how people reacted to his bombasity, though I suspect the sugar babies were willing to play along as long as they got paid.

I finally checked to see if he had used any of these emails to set up Craigslist accounts. His Craigslist ads were a goldmine!

wscott9527@yahoo.com placed 151 ads between 10/26/2008 and 4/12/2009 and bdoug7632@yahoo.com placed 28 ads between 4/23/2009 and 9/24/2010. It appeared he stopped using one at one point and started using the other. The 10/26/2008 beginning point corresponded with when he started spending family money. Craigslist must have been one of the first places he posted. His ads searched for women in cities from Boston to New Jersey, and even Tokyo, including

• Boston
• West of Boston (Metrowest)
• Hartford
• Worcester, MA
• Tarrytown and other NY suburb cities north of NYC
• Providence
• North and Central NJ
• NYC
• Tokyo

Early on, he looked for young women (21 – 40) but later broadened his range to women between 40 and 50. Perhaps he wasn’t successful in getting the younger ones.

I was surprised by his atrocious spelling and grammar and wondered why that was the case. Given the sheer number of posts, maybe he did them so quickly he didn’t bother to proofread them. On the other hand, he was efficient about recycling text from previous ads and dating profiles. Quite a bit of cut and paste!

His posts mostly sought out beneficial LT “relationships” with posting titles like

• Flirty, fit, sensual partner for a fun LT affair?
• A fun, mutually beneficial relationship for the new year?
• Are you 40 to 50 and seeking a fun partner for a LT flirty affair?

But there were quite a few posts looking for someone for one night or even an hour.

He would send as many as 5 in any given day sometimes sending the same ad with different titles, probably trying different ones to see if he would get any hits.

During a certain time period (November 2009 – January 2010) he was traveling quite a bit to Tokyo so he got on Craigslist there and put up posts for one or two night hookups.

He was blunt about money changing hands posting titles like

• Generou$ Gentleman $eeks Fun Friend – m4w
• Generous Gentleman ISO Fun, Friendly Lady to Spoil
• Your Perfect Friend with Benefit$ – m4w
• A $ugar $weet affair with a fun, sensual gentleman? – m4w

Though he claimed not to want “professionals,” I suspect he received responses from working girls. Many ads were so blatant about his generosity for a brief hook up, it is hard to imagine a hooker wouldn’t respond.

By far, the most disgusting were the posts with lengthy and detailed claims about his sexual skills and what he wanted.

Would anyone would actually read a personal ad that long? Then again, a windbag like him would be proud to post this as a “great example” of his conversational skills!

Where did this leave me? The profiles and Craigslist ads confirmed what many had been telling me about Scott, including mental health professionals. At a minimum he was a middle aged dweeb desperate for sex. At worst, he qualified as a sex addict. A therapist or psychiatrist would have a field day with his creepy oral fixation, in particular. Whatever the underlying explanation, the behavior was embarrassing and pathetic.

1. “Several websites took the leaked information and began creating searchable databases that let anyone type in an email to see if it’s part of the Ashley Madison dump. Some of those websites include Trustify and cynic.al.

   If you type in any email and it’s part of the database, it could mean one of three things: the email owner is an active member of the site, the email owner created an account but doesn’t use it or someone used that person’s email to create a fake account” (“Here’s how to check what data was taken from Ashley Madison and if your email is on the list,” by Alejandro Alba, New York Daily News, 8/21/2015).